I only have two kids.
That’s it. Two. 2.
Not very many, in the grand scheme of things.
I have several friends who have four kids. One of Chad’s brothers just had his fifth child. (Well, technically, the brother’s wife is the one who had the child, but…you know what I mean.)
Chad himself is one of eight kids.
Me? Two.
So please tell me: Why in the world can’t I get my kids’ names straight?
I know my kids’ names. If you sat me down and showed me a picture of each of my sons, I promise I would be able to correctly identify them.
Yet, in the heat of the moment — or even in simple, everyday conversation — I say the wrong name.
All. the. time.
(To be accurate, it’s not all the time. But it’s often enough. As in, multiple times per week.)
I’ll be chatting along, and happen to refer to a child — thinking I’m referring correctly — when all of a sudden, a family member will interrupt.
“You said C. Did you mean L.?”
or
“You said L. Did you mean C.?”
Yes, yes, of course I did.
For the record, there is a 7.5-year gap between my two boys. I had 7.5 years of saying C.’s name before I even had to consider saying another child’s name on a regular basis. But here we are, six years after Child #2, and I can’t seem to get my brain to spit out the right name without deliberate concentration.
Maybe it’s because they’re both boys.
Or maybe it’s because I’m 39 years old and parts of my brain are just giving up on me. Like the part that assigns the correct name to each child.
I don’t know. But I’m wondering if I need to come up with a new strategy.
Some ideas:
- Tattooing (or maybe just taping) each child’s name to his forehead, so I am always and forever confronted by the correct names, at least when I’m looking at them.
- Giving up on the name thing all together and just pointing in the correct kid’s general direction when referring to him.
- Using “hey you” or “what’s-your-name” as a general, all-purpose reference for either kid.
Sigh.
No, I’ll keep trying. I’ll muster up all the concentration I can, drink an extra cup of coffee, make intense eye contact…and hope the names come out right.
I’ve got 4 kids (2 boys, 2 girls). Not only do I often call them by each other’s name, I frequently call my oldest by my sister’s name. Drives her crazy. But I think what’s even worse is how often I call one of them “Rory” or “Campbell” (our dogs’ names). I might go through the whole list of names in our house before I get the right one out. Sigh…
It can’t be an age thing. When I was teaching (years ago!), I remember looking right at Luke one day and addressing him as “Amy”! They were used to me calling Amy “Beth” and Brian “Luke” but that day Luke just looked at me like he knew I finally lost it! I’m thinking the coffee is your best bet!
Five children?? Your brother-in-law should truly consider the environmental impact that his family is having. Not to mention putting his wife through that. Poor woman.
That all said, I often confuse two of my daughters, but I think that is because their names start with the same letter.
Ha-ha, Garr. I’m honestly very impressed at how effortlessly you and your wife handle being parents to five children. Even if you’ve started two of their names w/ the same letter, leading to confusion…
I grew up being used to being called Kari-Jorunn-Gunn-Eva by my grandmother all the time. Kari is my mother, Jorunn is my aunt, Gunn is my cousin. My younger sister was Kari-Jorunn-Gunn-Eva-Sølvi.
My brothers got a similar treatment as Odd-Svein-Bjørn-Frank-Roger and Odd-Svein-Bjørn-Frank-Roger-Jon Fredrik. And now I tend to call my oldest niece Sølvi-Gørild and her younger cousins Sølvi-Gørild…..
It’s all frustrating and apparently genetic.
I think that’s a given parental thing. People tell us we have that problem because we named all our boys starting with the same letter, but my parents did that with five kids and none of their names beginning with the same letter.
On the other hand, my kids will say, “Dad….I mean Mom,” so when they give me a hard time I can give it right back to them
Barbara H.´s last post ..Book Review: The Discovery
I have always mixed up Stephen and Will which I think can be forgiven since they are so close in age and looks…but for the last month I have been calling Stephen Joey on an almost regular basis. It has evolved to JoeWillStewhoeveryouare….feeling your confusion, being 39 definitely has something to do with it!
My aunt is more than a decade younger than my mom and her other sister, and from time to time my grandmother would get the names confused. And because their dog was around before the youngest daughter was around, sometimes the dog’s name got called first.
I have the same problem and I have a boy and a girl – three years apart lol – I blame Mom Brain!
Jen E @ mommablogsalot´s last post ..Peek – a – boo : fall palette found at the zoo.
I think it’s the coffee! My mom drank a lot of coffee and always started reciting names until she got to the right one( 6 kids). It’s strange, though, Daddy never did that. I did. Just two kids.
LOL I so remember my grammy doing this and now my parents do it.. so far I have only mixed the dog and Sammy up a couple of times
I think it is good to keep kids on their toes. Once they know you are attached to them, they walk all over you, so it is good to show them you barely remember their names.
That’s funny! My mom used to do that to my cousins all the time. One of my aunts had six kids and my mom would run through all of their names until she got to the right niece or nephew. My cousin has 4 sons and they’ve become “you boy…”
Gabriela – Living La Vida Normal´s last post ..DEAR Monday: 4 books in 4 days
Ha! I think my brain is going too. As you know, my kids have a big gap of 6 years too, but one’s a boy and one’s a girl. I sometimes still call the wrong one out!! And I often call my son the dog’s name if he’s under my feet. Crazy.
Jennifer, Snapshot´s last post ..You’ve Just Invalidated My Entire Existence
My brother is seven years younger than I am. I grew up being called Mike-Mark. He is Mark-Mike. And in my late teens, I started to get my uncle’s name, at least from my mom – his sister.
I really do think it’s a parent thing.
Oh I can so relate. With my kids added with the dayhome kids sometimes I resort to saying “you in the red shirt!”, which of course only works if they’re wearing a red shirt but you know what I mean. Sometimes I’ve forgotten dayhome parent’s names when introducing them to a new parent which is really embarrassing, to say the least, especially when they’ve been with me for years. I can’t very well say “Red shirt meet yellow shirt”. Sheesh. Gotta take more ginko, I guess.
LOL to Chad’s comment.
I have two kids. One boy. One girl. Six years apart. And yet I still call them by the wrong names. They aren’t even the same gender!
I’ve also been known to call one of them the cat’s name, too, so that’s probably even worse. Not just cross-age and cross-gender, but cross-species! O.o