Every year, toward the end of August, I’m struck with this same feeling.
Or rather, struck with these same feelings.
On the one hand, I am quite ready for school to begin. I’m not exactly the parent leaping through Staples singing “It’s the most wonderful time of the year…” (though I do love those office supplies), but I’m ready for the fall routine to kick in. Even though we probably won’t be any less busy, our schedule will at least be more predictable, more consistent.
I’m a big fan of consistency.
Besides, I find fall (or at least early fall) to be delightful. I love the cooler air, the changing leaves, the idea of drinking hot coffee on a cool morning.
On the other hand, I am wondering if I squandered the summer — at least to some extent. I second-guess my choices, the way I filled our days. I fret about missed opportunities to teach my kids important life lessons, lessons more easily taught when the distraction of school and homework aren’t around. I wonder if I was too grumpy too often, and I hope my kids could tell how very much I love them. I worry that, with the start of school, my ability to influence them wanes. I regret the shushing, the impatience, the times I messed up. I wish I’d been a better steward of the summer months.
My husband would tell you that I worry too much. And he would tell me that things are fine — the kids are happy and healthy and they know I love them. They had fun this summer, they learned, they tried new things.
But still. Sometimes I’m just overwhelmed by the whole “we only have one shot at this parenting thing” concept. And I wish I would do a better job.
Today, I’m thankful for my kids. And I’m thankful that every new season — even the busy school seasons that fill up with homework and projects and all kinds of activities — present new opportunities to teach them and to love them and to learn with them.
I’m a big fan of fall as well. Temps cool down and it isn’t as allergy crazy as spring. Plus holidays are on the way!
You know this, but I’ll point it out anyway. God ultimately is the one that will change our children’s hearts. He takes all of our crappy parenting and is able to make something wonderful from it. I have to remind myself of that nearly daily.
And if you’re like me, you probably were too grumpy too often.
So true, Rick, and I appreciate the reminder. I’m so grateful for a God who loves my kids far more than I do!
You worry too much. The kids are happy and healthy(in all categories).
Thanks, Mom.
You are not alone with those thoughts. I’m amazed at how forgiving my children are of the crazy stuff I do. And more amazed at how God continues to use me as their mom…just the fact that God made me a mom is amazing. And I don’t think filling the evening on Sunday night with us will be at all squandered. LOL! Looking forward to seeing all of you.
Thank you for posting this, it hits home.
I also needed to be reminded of what Rick said `God ultimately is the one that will change our children’s hearts. He takes all of our crappy parenting and is able to make something wonderful from it.`
I love school supplies.. I love the new beginnings but I hate it being the end of the summer! It all happens so fast! I am sure your kids had a great summer!
I feel the same way so much of the time. Mother guilt really sucks sometimes!
So glad I’m not the only one who frets over those missed opportunities (or so we think) and enjoys the beginning of the school year. Which is slightly funny, since at the beginning of the summer vacation I’m always rejoicing in the lack of schedule and the kids being home.
Like you are reading my mind today…LOL
I’m with you on this one. I am too idealistic, I know, but I was really feeling the Mommy guilt the other day, for various reasons. I will miss them so much when they go back to school, but I am definitely looking forward to getting back into the routines, despite the busyness that ensues.
P.S. I don’t regret NOT doing “Summer Bridge Activities” with my kids!
I love fall! There is nothing better than sending a child off to school and then enjoying a pumpkin spice latte at Starbucks ALONE!
I agree, summer has flown by and Aliza goes back to school on Tuesday, I am totally unprepared for this. There were so many things I wanted to do and now the chance is gone. Better luck next year.
Indeed, summer has almost ended, but I think the kids will remember all the fun, rather than the shusing and impatience that I too am guilty of. Its the small moments of pure happiness they take with them and remember in their adulthood.
Everyday contains teachable moments. You can try again tomorrow. And don’t be so hard on yourself!
(BTW, how did you get your logo up there? Mine won’t go for the life of me! That has been the bane of my existance this summer!)
Love your blog and so happy I found it!
I have similar feelings. We have a week left at home, and we did have a great summer, but I could have done so much more.
However, back-to-school also makes me feel like I have a fresh start, a chance to get things right, so we’ll see if I adapt some new habits
Jennifer, Snapshot´s last post ..My Nightstand – August
I cannot believe the summer is almost over too. I love office/school supplies but I have no children. I am looking forward to your Fall Reading Challenge.