Callapidder Days

I have to admit, I have diagnosed more than one illness with the help of Dr. Google.

At the first sign of illness in any member of my family, I’ve been known to hop on Google and begin a search involving symptoms, diagnoses, incubations, durations, treatment methods, and of course, “when to call the doctor.”

I like to be prepared. And to know how much sleep I can expect to get the following night.

I don’t do this for every illness, though. For example, I’m already well-versed in any and all details pertaining to upper respiratory infections. Especially since we’ve had about a gajillion hundreds of them pass through this house. So I don’t need a consultation with Google to know that a humidifier, some Pediacare and plenty of fluids are in order.

But whenever a particularly stressful, serious, or miserable infection seems to be festering in one of my loved ones, Google is my faithful sidekick.

Last February, Chad got the flu. Because I’ve memorized I’m familiar with Guide to Your Child’s Symptoms, I was quick to recognize flu-like symptoms in an adult. Nevertheless, I used a quick Google search to confirm that the sudden fever, complete exhaustion, and even painful eye movements were, indeed, signs that Influenza had arrived.

Fortunately, Dr. Google helped me figure out how many days to lock my husband in the bedroom to contain the disease encourage my husband to give in to bed-rest. And Dr. Google also pointed me to a handy tool: the CDC’s Flu Activity Map.

Aha! The perfect resource. With the CDC’s Flu Activity Map, I could determine when it would finally be safe to go out in public again. Unfortunately, that time didn’t come until April, and I had to get bread and milk long before then. So instead, I just checked the map so I knew exactly how much to worry about flu infections. At least it was good for something.  (Although my kids had received flu shots, the CDC was warning me that the shot was not all that effective last year. Hence, my concern.)

This year, I was amused, yet pleased, to read Google’s announcement that — thanks to people like me who use the Google search bar to type in symptoms and other illness-related queries — they think they can predict flu outbreaks just like the CDC does, except faster.

See, they keep track of what people search for. And if they see tons of people in Louisville, Kentucky or Billings, Montana searching for things like “sudden fever,” “body aches,” “extreme fatigue,” and “flu symptoms,” they can guess that a flu outbreak might be on the horizon. It turns out that I’m not the only person who visits Dr. Google before calling Dr. Pediatrician or Dr. Family Physician.

Google has put up a new site this year — Google Flu Trends.  Another tool to help me track the spread and intensity of influenza in my area.

So this year, if it turns out that the flu shot is ineffective, my concern about flu infections will be much closer to “real-time concern,” since Google thinks they can predict flu trends 10-14 days faster than the CDC does (since the CDC waits for data from physicians and hospitals to trickle in). This is great. After all, if you’re going to worry, you might as well be efficient and timely about it.

So today, I’d like to say: “You’re welcome, Google. You’re welcome for coming to you first, whenever someone in our house gets sick. You’re welcome for typing in symptoms, looking up treatment options, and bookmarking helpful sites. You’re welcome for aiding you in tracking the flu in my area. Really, I’m glad to help.”

[Editor's note: My tendency to occasionally worry about illnesses may have been slightly exaggerated in this post. I'm sure my husband would be quick to assure you that I am the very picture of serenity whenever I feel we are in danger of contracting the flu or a vicious stomach bug. Or, at least, he'd say that I get better about it as my kids get older. Right honey?]