So, I was sitting at Borders the other day, paging through a book or two, when the following conversation occurred mere inches from where I was sitting:
Customer (Male, 50-ish, well-groomed) to Borders Employee: Excuse me. Could you point me in the direction of your books on Atlantis?
Borders Employee (slightly caught off guard): Oh, um…sure. What type of book are you looking for? There could be novels, comic books, books about legends… You know, since Atlantis is a fictional place, there isn’t —
Customer (interrupting): That’s debatable.
[At this point, I went from a mere listener to an inconspicuous observer. I had a feeling things were going to get interesting, so while pretending to browse the books on my lap, I was actually watching the escalating encounter.]
Borders Employee (confused): Uh…What did you say?
Customer: I said, that’s debatable.
[Pause. Borders Employee seems to be scrambling for a response.]
Customer (clarifying): You said, ‘Atlantis is a fictional place.’ And I said, ‘That’s debatable.’
Border’s Employee (regaining his composure): Oh no, sir. I can assure you that it’s fictional. Atlantis didn’t really exist.
Customer (eyes have grown steely; every word is punctuated): That. Is. Debatable.
[The Borders Employee takes a step back and shows clear signs of an internal struggle. I have a feeling he's thinking something like, This guy is crazy. But he's also a customer. I should put him in his place. But then again, maybe I should just help him buy a book and get him out of the store.]
[Meanwhile, the Customer is outright glaring, and takes a step forward, practically daring the Employee to say one more word about Atlantis not existing. I have a feeling he's thinking something like, I'd like to send this guy to Atlantis. Then he'd realize I'm right. And as a bonus, he'd be out of my way.]
[I watch eagerly, convinced there's going to be a Colossal Atlantis Throwdown right in the middle of Borders. I'm also thinking, I wouldn't mess with the Atlantis guy if I were you. He means business.]
Borders Employee: Ahem. Um…
Customer: Look, do you have any books on Atlantis by ____? [He names some author I've never heard of.]
Borders Employee (looking extremely relieved to have a definitive question to answer): Come with me. We can look it up on the computer.
The two moved off and I went back to book-browsing. I was at Borders for a good fifteen minutes longer and didn’t hear any loud arguments or ambulance sirens, so I can only assume they put their Atlantean disagreement behind them and focused on the task at hand.
Some trips to Borders are more exciting than others.
{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }
That was definitely much more interesting than the last time that I was at Borders and an older man farted very loudly in the same aisle I was standing in.
Borders is such an interesting place.
That was hilarious! Thanks for sharing.
*snort* It takes all kinds…and Jesus said love ‘em all! LOL
You know, you could replace “Atlantis” with “Eden” and your story probably wouldn’t have changed much.
It is much easier to prove something DID exist than something NOT existing.
Atlantis was mentioned in fable and in scroll in the library of Alexandria, Egypt. Unfortunately the library was burned down and most of the knowledge there lost.
The Antikythera Mechanism was thought to be mythical device until it was found in the bottom of the Mediterranean Sea. With modern technology we have been able to see inside the rusty piece of metal, and using the tools that were thought to be available at that time, they have been able to reconstruct it and found that it is an extremely accurate star chart.
I guess what I am saying is, be careful what you choose to disbelieve ardently, as you may not have heard all the evidence that exists, just what was available.
Thanks for the laugh. Sorry to hear that you have thunderstorms… I miss those.
LOL.. that is to funny. Nothing exciting ever happens when I go to the bookstore.. glad that the Atlantis conflict resolved peacefully.
What happened to the customer is always right? I mean, why does this Border employee care what this guy thinks? Of course, this version makes for much much better blog fodder, and since we book lovers are a bit, well um, opinionated, I’m sure that it was hard for him to let it go. . . .
Too funny. There are certainly all sorts of people in this world!
“Some trips to Borders are more exciting than others.” Ummm, you can say that again!!
LOL - that is too funny. Nothing exciting happens to me when I go to the store. I loved Mrs. Bubba’s comment too.
Oh my goodness, what a hoot! I would have HATED to be that Borders employee and have had to deal with someone like that. Being an innocent bystander was probably enough
Hope you enjoyed your trip anyway - did you get some fun new books?!
Katrina–This is hilarious! I worked at Barnes and Noble for two years and a public library for five years and I have TONS of stories like these! You never know what you are going to hear when you work with books!
-Amy
http://lifebycandlelight.blogspot.com
Wow. I’m not sure how I handled it. I wonder what other things you would hear if you worked at a bookstore.
Boy. That guys loved him some Atlantis…
That’s hilarious! I shared that with my sister, and she appreciated the story as well.
Oh, that’s so funny. I love eavesdropping on things like that. The last time I did, it was at the vet, where one of the workers was giving a detailed explanation to another worker of how you could shoot someone in your home without going to jail for it. And they wanted me to leave my puppy overnight. Nope. Didn’t happen.
Man! I was at Borders today and nothing cool happened!
Wowza. Sounds like an interesting time, indeed!
You know, people really should READ more!
Thanks for the laugh today! I wonder what that guy reads!?
That’s hilarious!!